Archives for April 2014


Small windchop with tons of seaweed on the beach this morning pretty much throughout South Florida. It’s longboardable but with all that seaweed I wasn’t going out! Forecast is looking good for Friday. Bigger and better the further north you go.

Tales from the Underground: Episode 7 “The Spreading Infection of Sea Madness”


Day ??

What day is it?  Does it matter?  All I know is the days have become a blur and the mission at hand is to get barreled off our faces so we motor north back to a familiar area but drop anchor at an atoll we have yet to visit on this voyage.  A magical little island that splits the swells making for a racetrack right point on one side and a throatier left version on the other.  Unfortunately the winds and swell predominately favor one side usually…”BOO HOO!!!!”, as salty tears creep down my sun scorched face…”U mean I have to surf glassy, 3-4 ft point style rights?” “WTF!?!?!”…what a bunch of brats hey?…One by one we fill the empty lineup.  Ultimately having mock heats and writing each other off.  The cool thing about this spot is on this particular day there where a few swells from different directions hitting, which doesnt make for a razor’s edge point but a few different sections with different faces to each one.  This broke up the massive crowd of 8 and somewhat defeated the notorious shredder Nadar Taha’s heat strategy of sitting up top and waiting for the choice bombs as grade-A sets were popping up and down the reef.  Sneaky Fwed sat at the end of the line most of the sesh and eventually I caught onto the fact that hes was picking off more waves than anybody on the end section that nobody could make from up up top.  It was interesting to see everybody’s different strategies and we all got good ones…As I write this I couldn’t recall what we had for lunch but I’m sure It was one of Tim’s culinary masterpieces of epic proportion consisting of the fresh wahoo that JRoy brought in the day before.  A few of the boys went for the arvy sesh and scored some more good ones.  Being completely exhausted…I opted for the food induced coma.  I awaken to the boys coming in…”you snaked me…he won the heat…i had priority…no I did…that wasnt a 8.5…ect”…bummed I missed out on the camaraderie but needed the extra rest as there was supposedly more swell on the way…Once again an epic meal thanks to Timmy and photo review thanks to the legendary Dave, not “Dan”, Burden as I have ignorantly refered to him as…now I know why theres a photo or 2 that make me look “silly” to say the least…eventually everybody’s poison, mine being Bintangs, sends them to there quarters and the boat rocks us to sleep like babies…


Day??…lets just say the day after yesterday…

We hit the right first thing…playful conditions continue at the racetrack with long, glassy, down the line walls…everybody is in and out more or less all morning snagging their share of fun 3-4ft runners.  Chris wins the award for “best ding” taking a fin to his head and asking “am I bleeding?” as blood poured down his face in the lineup.  A minor gouge and not wanting to shave his stylish hair-doo led to Timmy military style super gluing the wound shut.  Theres an unspoken vibe consistent amongst our crew: we’re all feeling good and surfing good and want to put it to the test in big barrels.  Yet we’re at the mercy of nature and can do nothing more than enjoy our time in paradise…and enjoy we do…after a fun surf…Timmy whips up an epic beer battered wahoo “fish and chips” for lunch.  A devil wind comes up and the surf is more or less done for the day.  A crew heads to the island to climb the nearby lighthouse.  JRoy and our Indo Captain Chris take off for a spear.  That afternoon our vessel is boarded by the dread pirate “Doris” in search of a stick of butter and a few Bintangs.  Its always entertaining to throw a few back and listen to the colorful antics of the legendary salty dog.  Originally from Burliegh Heads, Australia; he was the first guy to surf Uluwatu in Bali.  He now, and has been for quite some time, runs his own boat the “Raja Elang” and guides surfers and swashbucklers alike through the Ments.  The pirates head back to there vessel and we pull anchor with a coarse set for a mooring for the night.  En route to our destination…as luck would have it Cain pulls in a spanish mackerel setting us up for more choice shashimi.  With everybody exhausted we had an early dinner, grilled wahoo, split peas, and a pumpkin mash.  We capped the evening with another photo review and many awards handed out.  I reckon the best award was handed to me but thats not for print…we fade off one by one with dreams of more surf…what will the new dawn bring our heros?…will this repetitive cycle end?…do we want it to end?…will we score the humunga cowabunga?..find out next time on Tales from the “this can’t possibly be interesting anymore” Underground…


Ended up going to St Lucie county the morning and scored some fun longboard waves.  I had to throw up a couple more funny shots from the SFA event yesterday.

Tales from the Underground: Episode 6 “Groundhog Day”



“Well put your little hand in mine…” wait…thats not my alarm clock, and as cool as he is, I’m not Bill Murray…I wake up to the soothing sound of a heavy metal chain being pulled from the the darkest depths of the sea…then I eat my fresh fruit over a coffee and write silly stories in an attempt raise societies intelligence level. Today, though the swell is down we find a few waves at the right we had been surfing the previous day. Super shallow makes for super fun round these parts and though the waves are small they still pack enough punch making it a struggle using the term “layday” to describe the days festivities. Everybody got fun waves and some of the boys went for a fish. Nothing special but still another day in paradise. My highlight of the day was lunch. Seared wahoo sashimi and dogtooth tuna poke, the recently caught ones, with a miso soup derived from a broth using the fish heads…sounds gnarly but it was to die for. A second grovel sesh went down at the right and a similar inside left across the bay…a session ridden with irony because out of 6 of us in the water between the 2 reef passes…4 chose to ride the #1 NightmareShapes groveler: The BuzzCu#t…it was just as much fun to surf but more fun to witness everybody ripping on their hand forged craft comprised of my blood, sweat, and tears. We pull anchor and head for our mooring for a cruisey evening of talking story, BS, a few buntings, and of coarse a wahoo, dogtooth, blue fin trevali, and choice filet feast, prepared by Timmy, rivaling the nectar and ambrosia of the gods. Everybody fades away at there own pace anticipating what the tide will bring us at day break…


Day 7

“Well put your little hand in mine…”. Sunny and Chers voices ring through my cranium as I stare into the dawn. Before my weary eyes…a sea of flatness and an onshore…that shouldn’t be a problem as theres a swell magnet facing the offshore around the corner. I’m withholding break names regardless if they’re well known or not but when a spot is titled “The Meat Locker” I feel obligated to let readers know that if they make the trek to said spot…a flesh donation to the reef is required…We anchor at the locker and the swell is minimal…everybody is pretty surfed out and cooked from intensity of the local UV levels…I suit up and hop in the water for a solo sesh…just me and the locker…I sit and wait and nothing…ultimately there were three sets in 40 minutes…I snagged an overhead wave off each one but the action was to slow as you don’t wanna play games with the little ones…they closeout and put you way to close to the meat cleaving coral on the inside…I call it just as Nadar comes to join me…”Laday”…which really isn’t so bad because 6 straight days of surfing does a body good but a day of recovery will get everybody sharp and firing again…we head back to a calm mooring and drop anchor…Timmy forced a wahoo cerviche worthy of kings down our throats…we didn’t put up much of a fight…we’re anchored between to small islands and a little atoll poking its head barely out of the surface. The water is turquoise crystal clear. One of the islands is a fully developed little atoll complete with a dense jungle in its core. After treats and snoozin’ around the lounge with the film “Castaway” playing…some were inspired to investigate the island…so while others lounged or fished…a search party comprised Cain, Josh, and myself boarded the ski and charted a coarse direct at said island. Fwed followed in tow on the SUP. We are greeted by giant green horse flies as we touch the foreign shores…they were even getting me through my t-shirt but, the little pests seemed to thin out as we rounded the windward side of the atoll where I saw a gap in the lush foliage that would grant entry to the islands innards…surprisingly the flies were thin once you were off the beach…yet my mission to find a coconut came to a halt when every tree i came to was covered in giant red ants…i didn’t wanna find out what they felt like…i caught up with Cain and Josh on the far windward shores where had stumbled upon a tide pool that was a natural nursery for baby black tip sharks…an attempt was made to get a gopro snap but they were way too fast. Eventually we had our fill of adventure, sunburn, and giant green flies so when headed back to the boat and relaxed for the evening. Another cruisey day to nurse our surf worn and sun battered souls with a wahoo green curry to cap things off…Will we awaken tomorrow to the dreaded sound of Sunny and Cher?…will we see a change in the tides?…will i Iose what little sanity I have left?…find out next time on Tales from an Idiot…



Absolutely gorgeous beach day for the Surfers for Autism event going on today at Deerfield Beach! You should be here!!!


Starting off to be an awesome beach day! Glassy flat with great visibility. Great day for a dive or fishing. Lot of seaweed and bait fish on the on the beach in Boynton.

So it’s the beginning of the flat Season. At least we have some great events to keep us entertained!

This weekend we have the “7th Annual South Florida Surfers For Autism Beach Festival” in Deerfield Beach. And a party/sale at 2nd street surfshop on Sunday with the Pompano Seafood Fest!


Next weekend, The 3rd and 4th is “The 8th annual Fiesta De Shred” Skim and surf contest in Deerfield.


Lymphfighters Ocean Swim and Paddleboard Relay to benefit Kyle Soto


My Story

Kyle Soto, 15, B-cell Lymphoma!

It all started on Super bowl Sunday, when I noticed a lump on my left cheek. After numerous tests the CT SCAN showed there was an unknown mass and it would have to be removed. The surgeons decided to take it from inside my cheek and the process for surgery began. The surgery was successful and we received the biopsy results around the beginning of March. The results came back as B-Cell Lymphoma. As of now I have undergone another surgery and multiple procedures and started chemotherapy. Please come support me in my fight and join us for the ocean swim and paddle board event. Please visit my Facebook page at Lymphfighters/Team Kyle. For donations to Kyle’s medical fund please visit:

Thank you.



When: 10.00 a.m. – 3:00 p.m. May 31 2014

Onsite registration starts at 9:00 a.m.

Where: Fort Lauderdale Beach South Beach (across from Sta.49)

Register at:

Contact: Mike Salzano Cell:954-650-1741 Email:



Party at 2nd St Surf Shop for the Seafood Festival!

pompano seafood fest 2nd st surfshopThis Sunday we are blowing up the parking lot for Seafood Festival! STOREWIDE SALE!! BOARD SWAP!! FREE FULL WETSUIT WITH NEW BOARD PURCHASE!! Come party it down with your fun friends at 2nd St Surfshop!! MUSIC, ARTS, AND FOOD ALL DAY!

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Tales from the Underground: Episode 4 “Slow Cooked Meat and Sunburn Treats”

Clunk, clunk, clunk, clunk, clunk…the most beautiful sound to grace our sleeping ears every morning as the anchor is pulled and the day is on. After a quick surf check at the spots we had called home for the previous 2 days a council amongst the elders is called at the breakfast table and the decisions made lead us deeper into the no man’s land to the south. We pull into a bay on the southwestern shores of an uninhabited island…home to a notorious deep water left known for its punishing hold downs as well as rewarding freight trains to glory. The left was working and Doris, the sneaky pirate he is, was already on it with his crew of swashbucklers. It didn’t matter as depending on who you were to ask, especially Cappy and myself, the true hidden gem of this little wave oasis is the mutant righthand semi-slab on the far inside of the bay. The beauty of this hidden treasure is it looks like nothing from the back because the waves have no backs as they unload picture perfect barrels across the shallowest bottom we have encountered thus far. High risk high reward at a spot so perfect its not hard to get over-confident and find yourself on the inside doing the spider monkey swim to avoid contact with 10,000 razorblades. We were out there. Cappy, Cain, and I didn’t even look at the left. Eventually our whole crew was out trading off head+ right tunnels. We surfed a marathon sesh and didn’t want to get out even after the winds came up, which was a few hours into it. Timmy had to pull us out of the water, “We’re goin around the corner where its offshore and reeling ya slack carntts!!!” Tim’s always on top of it whether its putting us into shallow slabs, or keeping us well fed and firing, or joining all the boys in one of our “constructive criticism” peanut galleries…the guy is an all around legend…We ran a few clicks south to one of my absolute favorite spots in the world to surf. A name withheld right-hander that resembles a perfect day at Snapper Rocks, Australia but in crystal clear water wrapping around a tiny little atoll poking its head above the surface and without 10,000 of your best mates. The reef below is lit up with so many different colors you feel like your sitting in a giant fish tank. With everybody beat from the first sesh…Cappy, Tim, and myself traded off chest+ machine like peelers for hours. We eventually were letting the B+ ones go by because exhaustion was making the long paddle back out quite slow and draining and it wasn’t worth using those last little bits of energy unless it was a golden set from Posieden himself. We wrapped it up and headed in exhausted and beat down from hours of paddling in the searing equatorial sun. I can think of quite a few better ways to slow-cook meat other than roasting ourselves in UV for hours but you gotta pay to play I reckon…It was 4:00 pm and we called it a day and with earlier whispers of piano coladas…George and I were on the blender with a smorgasbord of fresh fruits…did we have a clue what we were doing?…no…but how could you go wrong with fresh fruit and rum? Flash foreword 2 hours and who knows what psycho-babble jargon is coming out of my mouth…Cappy’s got a boom box on his shoulder and he’s dancing up a storm that would impress Michael Jackson…Chris thinks he’s the late Oderus Urungus of Gwar with a mouthful of meat saying “I’m gonna kill you in the night with a battle axe”…we’re here for a good time not a long time and our cheeks hurt from laughing…we were thoroughly enjoying our evening yet meanwhile unbeknownst to us at the time…Cliff, Cain, and Tim were on adventure of there own on the tin boat…they rolled back up to the boat screaming as they had landed a dog tooth tuna, a spanish mackerel, and a GT…we will be eating very well over the next few days…after the fish were filleted and the blood stains were cleaned…we all sat down to a massive feast of fish, lamb, beef, mixed salad, potatoes, ect…an epic meal to cap a great day off…finishing up with yet another “constructive criticism” photo review leaving all parties involved in need of a clean pair of trousers and a cheek massage from laughing so hard…can it get any better? will our heros discover bigger, better, more menacing surf? will we end up Tom Hanks on a deserted island? find out next time my little kiddies on Tales from the Underground…



Glassy flat conditions pretty much throughout South Florida. Looks to stay that way for the next week.